refuse to think, refuse to feel.

burning all the love letters he sent to me
reread some, laughable.
long sigh, bittersweet smile.
no more tears left, refuse to think, refuse to feel.

after all these years,
it’s hard to say if to find a new heart again
this drenched one is not that bad
still beating, nothing really broken.

smile, and refuse to think, refuse to feel.
keep repeating this, on and on
til the day this heart flies to the empty sky,
let this faith dispersed in the air, just like him.





You said our love is separated by vast mountains and sea, cannot go through it. So it is a hopeless love.

But there are always small paths on the mountains and ships on the sea, if you abandon your self-centered heart and mind, you can find love and never let go this faith.

Borrowed Soul

borrow me an umbrella
escape the lights,
so my soul can walk comfortably
with her beside me

borrow me a lantern
accompanied by a dim light,
so i can walk thru this dark alley
see our shadows walk together

borrow me a time
once i wasted
under this endless misty rain
see her for the last time

she walk under the moonlight
the frozen breeze hit her bones
but she refuse to say it’s cold

wind blows, tell her most favorite fable
tears falls, rewinding her most remembered words
i can see her buried dreams turn into ashes

as if walking to endless path
against the wind, among the crowd
whispering to the wind the words she haven’t said
wishing us for a better ordinary life.


it is a feeling felt not only for commoners,
me, the one who take a distance from them, also falls
and fail to guard myself from the drizzling rains
thick fog, clean air, you are standing in front of my eyes.

because of you i started a war for a peace
in this circle of life, i make my journey
at the end of the world, at the end of the road,
your image on that day emerged.


fall, fall
let the fallen buried deep in a hunger mountains
keep, keep
keep the ashes intact from soaring up to the sky

to be in such state of devastation
suspicious mind, worse than the strangers
wind blows my anger to everywhere it pleased
leave me with these walls with ears.

low, keep low
slow the heartbeat
bow, keep bowing
to the centre of the heart

to the beyond i throw my sight in silence
passing your lifetimes
it is not a waiting for someone
it is a waiting until everything empty and dispersed,


i used to think, just let it be
everyday dealing with fools,
seeing those money-eater pigs,
i am clinging onto such words as “be patient”.

then i look back,
sum all my fears, having lost identities,
diminishing courages, hopeless future,
all of these years living under sheet of insecure.

today, i don’t care anymore
cannot care much about being a nice or a nasty person
i live only once, i do not want carry regrets into my graveyard,
i must stand up for myself, be my own shield, protector of my own karma.

Never Ending Nights

people born in this world carrying their own fate
leading their own destiny to certain paths
parted ways, greet and good bye, come and go
desert wind, midnight song is lonely, fireflies come late
when they come, carrying a news from faraway land

some longing for the city of lights
familiar faces grown old, older than the mountains
walk in the clouds, hear my song to the journey underworld
river of pain, as we flow into the ocean
at the end of the world, will you be there waiting for me?

so this is love, when it left me i’m frozen
banished into abyss darkness, never ending nights
so i let the path leads me to perdition
if you could come back, if i could turn back time
so what if i’m a pathetic of love, denied by my wronged hearts?

guess i’m living long enough to see your graveyards turn into garden of flowers
is still a simple blessing for they who left alone in this lifetime.